Hindsight is a wonderful thing, and in March 2008, if I had known what I know now, I would have said to the Doctors and Nurses, “Just remove my colon and give me a bag”.
I must say it took hundreds of prednisolone, azathioprine, mercaptorpurine and asacol tablets and pints of blood, saline, hydrocortisone and cyclosporin to take the decision out of my hands and give me my bag for life!! And a bag for life it is!!
Since my sub-total colectomy in November 2009, I have managed to finish my university degree and gain a 2:1 in BA(Hons) Secondary Education, get myself a full time, very demanding job with my local council Social Services department, appear on a ITV game show and win £25,000 and meet the most perfect man in the world!!
I was given the choice of a bag or a box, and I know I made the right decision! Life really has been good since my operation, and it’s not over yet!
As well as saving a deposit for a mortgage on a house, the lovely Scott and I are planning a trip to New York next year, as well as a twelve day trip to LA, Las Vegas and San Francisco. Things I would never have dreamt of doing before my ileostomy, and things that would have been impossible if I wasn’t here at all!
The operations are not over yet! I’m due my proctectomy any week now, just to remove the last part of my rectum and give me a “Barbie bum”. I chose the proctectomy over the pouch construction. The main reason being, I have no problem aesthetically with my bag on my belly, so I don’t see what I would be gaining by having the pouch!
I do feel that everything I’ve been through has made me a much stronger, mature person. However, my ileostomy is only a small part of who I am, and it definitely doesn’t define me! I’ve learnt that when you accept your bag, others will also accept it! As proud as I am to have my bag, I have the same goals and aspirations as other people. To live my life as much as I can and enjoy every minute of it! Even those minutes when I’m hovering over the toilet, emptying the contents of my bag. At least I’m doing it with my heart still beating and a smile on my face!!
